It’s been a while since I updated you on how my uterus is feeling, so now that I’m sitting alone at a cafe in Ubud, I felt like the time was right.
The last time I talked to you was a very happy day – already 95 days ago! (oh my god, time really flies.) I experienced a period of zero pain and was jumping around my dads house cheering for the holistic world and my own healing capacity. But – I’ve come to understand that doing things the holistic and natural way is not a straight upward facing line. Everything natural in life is swinging, and although going in one direction it’s not linear. In other words, it hasn’t been perfect since.
The period after the painless one (march) was very bad. Not to the extend that it was before, but definitely not good. I think I had my last acupuncture session the last week of April, and then moved out of the city – left with no treatment at all.
After that I’ve had better and better periods. The insane cramps has decreased in duration. When at it’s worst it lasted 24 hours, then it slowly went down to 10 hours, and my last one was only 2 hours. I’m not taking any painkillers cause I want to see how long it lasts, so I know for sure that the level of pain is the same, but the duration is for sure decreasing. Two major things has changed in the past few months, and I deeply believe that this is the reason why I’m healing.
I’ve been a little afraid of writing this, because I’ve had various feedback when telling friends and family about my thoughts. But I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m okay with being a weirdo in some peoples eyes, if I can help others.
I’ve always been an intuitive person – by that I’m talking about my gut feeling and basing my decisions on it. I know very well if something is right or wrong for me, without really having a theory or facts to base it on. I know when I’m on the right track – and definitely when I’m not.
I’ve always been the girl who loved having my period – and a part of that is because it used to be one hundred percent pain free. June last year was the beginning of an era where I stumbled upon a few very new situations for me, and had no idea if I went into it with a feeling of fear or if it was a “no” from my intuition. I couldn’t really tell. So I kept on going – and that’s when the pain started.
Without going too much into detail I had bad feelings about some of the people I was hanging out with and also my living situation in my new apartment. In theory everything was perfect, and there’s nothing wrong with either of them – I just had the feeling that it wasn’t for me. I’d also had traveling in the back of my mind for years, but kept suppressing it. In the process of wanting to see if I was afraid of settling or actually was at the wrong place – I watched my periods getting worse and worse.
Over the past few months I’ve ended the relationships and moved out of my apartment – now finding myself in Bali. And as I just mentioned, I’m watching my periods getting better and better. Not a single part of me believes this is a coincidence.
Our intuition is so much more powerful than we give it credit for now a days. If it’s capable of giving us stomach pain, diarrhoea, nausea and headaches, why wouldn’t it be able to manifest chronic diseases?
If your intuition is telling you something, listen. We’re not just a body, we’re mind and spirit as well. Thinking that the last two parts is insignificant is a huge mistake.
Until next time,